Monthly Archives: January 2014

Reading Resources

Reading Resources
After a child discloses sexual abuse, caregivers may have many questions about what happens next. Here is a list of books that can be helpful to a family where a child is a victim of sexual abuse. It is important to keep in mind that books should be used with therapy and not in place of counseling services. Remember to read each book before sharing it with children!
For Children 
My Body Is Private by Linda Walvoord Girard
Telling Isn’t Tattling by Kathryn M. Hammerseng
Your Body Belongs to You by Cornelia Spelman
Those Are My Private Parts by Diane Hansen (for young children)
Tears of Joy by Barbara Behm (ages 4 and up)
For Teenagers
It Happened To Me: A Teen’s Guide to Overcoming Sexual Abuse (workbook) by William Lee Carter
We Are Not Alone: A Teenage Boy’s Personal Account of Child Sexual Abuse from Disclosure Through Prosecution & Treatment by Jade C. Angelica
We Are Not Alone: A Teenage Girl’s Personal Account of Child Sexual Abuse from Disclosure Through Prosecution & Treatment by Jade C. Angelica
Invisible Girls: The Truth About Sexual Abuse by Dr. Patti Feuersteisen
For Parents/Caregivers
Children Changed by Trauma: A Healing Guide by Debra Alexander
When Your Child Has Been Molested: A Parent’s Guide to Healing & Recovery by Kathryn Brohl
Healing the Harm Done: A Parent’s Guide to Helping Your Child Overcome the Effects of Sexual Abuse by Jennifer Levy-Peck
For Adult Survivors of Abuse
Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide to Survivors of Sexual Abuse by Wendy Maltz
The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis
The Courage to Heal Workbook by Laura Davis
Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse by Mike Lew
For Special Populations
No Secrets No Lies: How Black Families Can Heal From Sexual Abuse  by Robin Stone
I Will Survive: The African American Guide to Healing From Sexual Assaults and Abuse by Lori Robinson
I Can Be Safe! by the Abused Deaf Women’s Advocacy Service




Signs of Abuse

Child Sexual Abuse – Signs to Look For

Signs in Offenders

  • Makes you or children feel uncomfortable by lack of respect for boundaries
  • Engages in excessive physical contact with children
  • Spends more time with children than adults his/her own age
  • Spends excessive time emailing and text messaging with children
  • Is unusually aware of kid trends, terminology, computer games, and music
  • Overly interested in the sexuality or developing body of pre-teens and teens
  • Arranges to spend uninterrupted time with kids
  • Is “Great with the kids!” or “Too good to be true!”
  • Showers kids with gifts, treats, special outings
  • Let’s kids break the rules or get away with inappropriate behavior
  • Asks kids to keep secrets

Signs in Children

  • Physical Signs
    • Evidence of physical trauma to the genital or anal areas
    • Complaints of pain during urination or bowel movements
    • Exhibiting symptoms of genital or urinary tract infections or STDs such as offensive odor, redness, rashes or burning
    • Self mutilation (puncturing with pins or cutting)
    • Health issues associated with anxiety such as chronic stomach pain or headaches
  • Emotional or behavior signs
    • Aggressive behavior towards friends and family
    • Withdrawal from friends, family or activities they previously enjoyed
    • Anxiety or panic attacks
    • Phobias
    • Fear of certain people, places or activities
    • Excessive sadness or depression
    • Decreased school performance
    • Eating disorders, loss of appetite, gagging
    • Sleep disturbances, nightmares, screaming, sweating
    • Regressive behaviors, bed wetting, separation anxiety
    • Numbing pain with drugs, alcohol or cutting
    • Need to be perfect
  • Sexual signs
    • Increased questions about human sexuality
    • Excessive masturbation
    • Increased sexual play with friends, pets, toys
    • Talking about or acting out specific adult sexual acts
    • Increased choice of sexually revealing clothing
    • Signs of promiscuity 


TAALK Talk About Abuse to Liberate Kids

1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys
will be sexually abused
before the age of 18

That’s 20% of our population!

20% of our children will be sexually abused
20% of our adults have been sexually abused

The Center for Disease Control estimates that 5-20% of the population will get the flu each season. Think of every person who told you that they had the flu this past year or that their spouse had the flu or maybe your own child said he or she had the flu.

Imagine if instead they said:
I was sexually abused by my Dad
My husband was raped by his priest
My teacher touches me down there

Now realize that those people are probably just a fraction of the people YOU know who have experienced child sexual abuse. Just because you don’t know who they are, doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. There are survivors all around you – in your community, in your neighborhood, and possibly even in your own home. Will you be the one to start TAALKing?

Is Your Child Being Molested?

Learn to Listen with Your EyesSigns of Child Sexual Abuse - Listen With Your Eyes

5* Review posted on amazon

5.0 out of 5 stars Great Book!, January 13, 2014
Reading Fanatic (CMP) (Boston, MA United States) – See all my reviews
Amazon Verified Purchase(What’s this?)
I love this book. My husband heard about it from a friend and decided to purchase it. It is a great tool to use to assist parents when talking to your little one about inappropriate touches. One of the things I really love about the book is the way it stresses that “those are my private parts.” This phrase is repeated over and over in the book like a refrain. Furthermore, it highlights the fact that inappropriate touches can come from anyone, including a parent. Additionally, the book encourages children to report bad touches to an adult. It is illustrated with cute “little kid” pictures like stick figures and the like. It reads almost like a poem and my children love it. It starts with:This is where the learning starts
About boys and girls and private parts.
The front is different; the back is the same.
And most important of all, there are no private parts games.Those Are MY Private Parts!Usually my husband and I read the lines, and my children will chant the refrain together……..actually they like to shout it! I’m sure our neighbors have probably heard them shouting “those are my private parts” on more than one occasion! LOL Every time we read this book we use to segue into a discussion with our children about inappropriate touching. I usually quiz them where I give examples of a touch in various scenarios and they have to tell us if it’s “okay” or not. I would highly recommend this book to any parent.